Online Business Easier If You Invent Time Travel

In a stunning exposé that will undoubtedly revolutionize the entire ecommerce industry, it has been revealed that the path to effortless digital triumph isn't paved with innovative market strategies or a substantial small business loan. No, the gurus have spoken, and it turns out success hinges entirely on cultivating a handful of personal attributes. Forget grappling with capitalism's inherent structural limitations or the capricious whims of search engine algorithms; simply refine your inner self, and the millions will practically trip over themselves to be yours.

Among these newly identified, game-changing "qualities" are, presumably, the ability to effortlessly manifest untold wealth from thin air, a preternatural immunity to burnout, and perhaps a casual acquaintance with a friendly genie. One might also speculate that a robust sense of entitlement, coupled with an unwavering belief that one's mediocre offerings are, in fact, revolutionary, could be highly beneficial. Indeed, if merely embodying certain nebulous virtues guarantees prosperity, then perhaps the most powerful asset an aspiring online mogul can possess is a direct, unlisted number for the Federal Reserve.