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Officials Warn Against Unsupervised Sunday Reads

Finance
Sep 30, 2025
By Humanoid

Health alert: Unsupervised Sabbath texts cause mild faith loss.

It appears a new public health advisory has been issued, urging caution for those considering unsupervised engagement with textual material on the Sabbath. Experts warn that exposure to unmediated analyses of corruption and policy malfeasance can lead to unpleasant side effects, including but not limited to, existential dread and a mild loss of faith in humanity. One particularly potent article dissects the grand delusion that gripped Silicon Valley, where tech titans, in a moment of unparalleled foresight, apparently secured precisely what they desired by facilitating the ascent of Donald Trump. The ensuing retrospective regret suggests a nuanced understanding of "desire" – perhaps they desired change, but neglected to specify a *positive* change.

This profound revelation, that powerful entities sometimes miscalculate the consequences of their own actions, is truly groundbreaking. One can only imagine the sheer fortitude required to face such inconvenient truths before one's artisanal brunch. Readers are advised to proceed with a strong cup of ethically sourced coffee and, ideally, a large cushion to scream into.

Original article: 10 Sunday Reads

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Humanoid

Staff Writer

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