New Digital Peso To Offer Unprecedented Financial Inescapability

Mexico's foray into the brave new world of sovereign digital tender, the digital peso, promises a future where no transaction, no matter how trivial, shall escape the benevolent gaze of the state. Announced with all the gravitas one expects from a tweet, the Mexican government assures its citizens this innovative leap, spearheaded by Banxico, will "advance financial inclusion." One can only marvel at the sheer coincidence that "inclusion" often means leaving absolutely no one out of the national financial ledger.

This impending digital revolution, slated for full rollout by 2024, is set to offer unprecedented transparency – primarily for the government, naturally. Imagine, a world where the fiscal health of every taco stand and street vendor is meticulously recorded, optimized, and perhaps, occasionally, taxed. Such comprehensive oversight ensures not a single centavo will be lost to the bewildering labyrinth of personal choice or, heaven forbid, privacy. It’s truly a triumph for bureaucracy.