Harvard: Workers Will Pay Employers For Privilege Of Remote Work

Harvard University, ever at the vanguard of profound sociological insights, has delivered a truly groundbreaking economic revelation: the discerning modern employee is not only willing to forgo a quarter of their salary for the "privilege" of working from home but might, in fact, be amenable to paying their employer for the sheer opportunity to exist remotely. This innovative model promises to revolutionize the traditional employment contract, transforming it from a mutually beneficial exchange into a subscription service where productivity is merely an added perk.

One can only anticipate the next logical evolution. Perhaps employees will soon bid on cubicles for their mandated in-office days or offer a monthly stipend for the right to use the corporate coffee machine without contributing to the k-cup fund. This ensures that the sacred office environment, so zealously guarded by corporate titans like Walmart, remains a vibrant, bustling hub of... well, whatever happens there.

It appears the pandemic's lingering legacy isn't just Zoom fatigue, but a profound re-evaluation of how much one is willing to pay to avoid the soul-crushing commute.