Fire TV Stick 4K now replaces all complimentary hotel mints

The humble after-dinner mint, a beacon of fleeting hospitality, is reportedly on its way out. Sources close to the hotel industry — mostly those currently receiving an unprecedented number of bulk packages — suggest that the traditional peppermint now faces stiff competition from the Amazon Fire TV Stick. With the streaming device currently plummeting to an almost symbolic $9.99 for "select customers," the logistical leap from tiny candy to personal entertainment hub seems all but inevitable.

One can only imagine the sheer joy of returning to one's room after a long day of, say, contemplating existential dread, to find not a refreshing burst of sugar, but a portal to endless content. This radical shift, conveniently timed with the annual Black Friday) descent into consumer madness, perfectly encapsulates our modern priorities: why savor a moment of sweetness when you can instead drown in a glut of 4K programming?

It seems the future of complimentary amenities, much like our collective attention spans, is now entirely owned by Amazon. Forget turndown service; prepare for firmware updates.