Expert Panel Notes Existence Of Several Books

Groundbreaking new research has definitively confirmed that objects referred to as books are not merely a figment of our collective imagination. An exhaustive multi-year study by a consortium of highly-funded academic institutions has just published its findings, concluding with irrefutable evidence that numerous examples of bound paper, printed with words, are indeed being produced and circulated within the global publishing industry.

Among the startling discoveries were specific titles, each apparently containing distinct narrative or informational content. Researchers painstakingly cataloged works such as 'A Guardian and a Thief,' 'Trip,' 'Ready for My Close-Up,' and 'The Eternal Forest,' noting their unique string of characters and relative lack of internal combustion. The implications for the future of literature are, predictably, being debated with the gravitas such revelations demand. One can only imagine the sheer existential dread, or perhaps elation, this news will cause among those who previously thought words simply dissipated into the ether upon utterance. A truly remarkable age we live in, where the obvious requires an entire panel and several grants to become 'fact'.