Breakthrough: Congress Finds The 'On' Switch For Government

It appears that after considerable deliberation, and what sources close to the situation are calling "an unprecedented level of intellectual heavy lifting," members of the United States Congress have finally identified a novel mechanism for reactivating federal operations. The groundbreaking discovery, observed during what is now colloquially known as a "government shutdown," involves the strategic application of external stimuli.

Researchers noted that a potent combination of pervasive public frustration – often manifesting as mild grumbling and the occasional viral social media post – coupled with escalating internal discomfort among elected officials, proved surprisingly effective. This innovative "push-and-pull" approach, wherein a critical mass of inconvenience and looming electoral consequences seems to compel lawmakers to, astonishingly, fulfill their basic duties, is being hailed as a triumph of modern governance. Experts suggest this method, though seemingly complex, could prove foundational for future periods of legislative inertia.