BJORN Token Guarantees Uninterrupted Vitality

BJORN, the latest innovation to grace the blockchain, promises nothing less than ‘uninterrupted vitality.’ Launched on pump.fun, this token purports to imbue holders with an unprecedented zest for life, a claim as audacious as it is unsubstantiated. The anonymous development team, in a masterclass of transparency, assures future users that holding BJORN will somehow translate into heightened alertness and prolonged existence, effectively making ‘death by rugpull’ a thing of the past for true believers.

Skeptics might point to the lack of a whitepaper beyond a hastily drawn flowchart featuring a soaring rocket and a stick figure looking suspiciously spry. However, true diamond hands understand that tangible utility is for traditional finance. The real value, according to the project’s X account, lies in the collective belief that one's immune system will somehow be tokenized, or perhaps simply immune to market downturns. Those seeking an immediate boost of energy for their next degenerate ape-in need look no further. Just don’t ask for a peer-reviewed study, or indeed, any proof beyond vague assertions of 'community-driven longevity' and 'future partnerships with the concept of living.'

Original token: Bjorn to be Alive ($BJORN)