Area Man's Dad Becomes Key Consultant For Terror Plots

The bureaucratic maze of modern radicalization has, it appears, introduced an intriguing new role: the seasoned parental consultant. Aspiring operatives in Michigan, it has emerged, sought critical insight from the father of a prominent local firebrand regarding the optimal timing for their prospective terror plots. One can almost picture the conference call: a delicate discussion of logistical nuances, perhaps even a gentle suggestion to wait until after dinner for maximum impact.

Indeed, why consult the alleged hate preacher himself when his venerable father offers a more… shall we say, *foundational* perspective? Perhaps the senior statesman's wisdom extends beyond theological exhortations to include invaluable advice on seasonal operational windows, avoiding peak traffic, or even the most effective use of a discount Halloween costume. It seems even the most ardent proponents of extremism value a multi-generational approach to strategic planning, ensuring their ventures are not only ideologically sound but also logistically considerate.